Sharing care with love

Sandra Matinhos, the charity’s founder, was diagnosed with the condition seventeen years ago, at 35 years old, quite a young age to go through one of life’s most challenging journeys. “I was diagnosed with triple-negative cancer, which unfortunately, today is still considered very aggressive”, she told The Portugal News. “Back then, there wasn’t any treatment for this type of cancer. There is nowadays, but I did a conventional treatment for other types of cancer and was luckily able to beat it.”

However, she was later diagnosed with the BRCA1 genetic mutation, which predisposes patients to cancer in the breasts, ovaries, and pancreas. “As I carried this mutation, it was advised that I have my breasts removed, so I did a bilateral mastectomy and removed my uterus and ovaries too. On the grounds of preventing another recurrence, I decided this was the right decision to protect my life”, Sandra shared. “It wasn’t easy, and it deeply affects your sense of femininity.”

During one of her many visits to the hospital for a variety of chemotherapies, she experienced an epiphany. “I pleaded and prayed to God for an opportunity at life”, Sandra recalled. “If I could survive, I would know I had a mission to fulfill, I just didn’t know what it would be.”

Once she recovered, her first venture on this mission was to help the homeless. “I wanted to escape cancer, so I started by supporting people on the streets, feeding them and donating clothing”, she continued.

“That was the driving force behind my realisation that I’m here to help people in fragile situations. Then, I began coming into contact with breast cancer patients who were having financial difficulties. They couldn’t work because of their condition, their partners had left them, and through my own experiences, I felt their pain.”

At the time when Sandra was fighting cancer, there was a significant lack of support services. “My close friends and family were my only support; it was almost taboo to have breast cancer”, she mentioned. “I felt so lost, and many times I couldn’t find the answers that I needed to ease my fears. That’s why I wanted to create an organisation to provide the care and information that I had been missing.”

Beyond cancer

Associação Partilhas e Cuidados bases its support on two fundamental pillars: socioeconomic and psychoemotional. The first element manifests itself in offering material goods and financial aid for people in need, such as food and help paying the bills. There are also many cases of single mothers, in which the charity provides essentials like diapers and baby milk.

Furthermore, the latter involves supporting patients’ psychological needs, with activities such as Reiki, hypnotherapy, and yoga, as well as organising support groups headed by professional psychologists.

“We also offer the option to be accompanied to hospital visits for treatment and consultation”, Sandra elaborated on their activities. “We do everything we can so that we can be there when they need us the most. Normally, it’s just me doing this work; I’m always there with them, and for them, it’s really meaningful.”

In addition, there are two other services she provides that are indispensable: home visits and end-of-life care. “For those that are bedridden or hospitalised, we go read them stories, a book, whatever they want to hear, or just keep them company and talk”, she explained, “and last but certainly not least, we fulfill wishes for people who are coming towards the end of their life, so that even when looking in the face of death they may have something to cling onto for hope.”

“The psychological aspect is one of the most pivotal elements for a person to remain true to themselves. They have to feel like hope exists, that there’s something beyond their condition”, she added. “It’s important for people to understand that even when having cancer, they’re not submitted to it. They have to believe they have control over their condition, over their own life.”

Witness to the Rebirth

For Sandra, knowing she’s playing this vital role in her patients’ lives is all the motivation she needs. “Sometimes there’s a feeling in the back of my mind telling me to give up, because I’m in contact with a very difficult, painful reality that is accompanying young women to their deaths. I’m with them until their last day if need be, and many have passed away”, she lamented. “But their smiles, hugs and looks of gratitude keep me going, the feeling that I’m making a difference in their life, even if only a little.”

“I’ve done this for 11 years voluntarily, without any monetary reward, I’ve dedicated my whole self to this project, and I think that makes people end up feeling more comfortable”, Sandra expressed. “They see that I’ve gone through everything, and I am still here for them.”

“There’s a phase in which they distance themselves from me, when they receive the news that there’s no longer a possible cure”, she recounted. “At that stage, I try to ease them into that final acceptance and prepare them for their passing. I attempt to advise them to leave messages for their family, do a photoshoot or record their voice. They slowly but surely tend to begin accepting me again, and let me stay with them until the end. But each case can go in many different ways. For my part, I try to always let them know that what’s important is that they retain the capacity to receive love.”

“I’ll be honest, though, two years ago I suffered a burnout”, Sandra admitted. “It was when I experienced my seventh death. I had just come back from a funeral, got to my office, when my daughter called and told me someone else had passed away. At that moment, I lost the strength, I left the association’s office and told myself I wouldn’t be back for a while, because it was just too much.”

During this period, her mind was still on helping her patients and anyone else who may be struggling with breast cancer. She took the time away to create a notebook which acts as a guide and agenda for breast cancer patients, inspired by how she hadn’t found another product of that type on the market. It features areas for keeping track of appointments, medication use, and treatments, while offering personal reflections and encouragement.

If you want to support Associação Partilhas e Cuidados, you can donate directly to the charity through the IBAN PT50 0010 0000 5118 2969 0017 1, or deliver goods such as non-perishable foods, clothing, and tools to their office during fundraising events. Please make sure to visit https://www.paraalemdocancro.com/, the personal website of Sandra Matinhos, who’s dedicated her time to running this charity as an unpaid volunteer. There, you can also purchase her breast cancer guide and book detailing her experience with the condition.